Have you seen that meme where it’s like “remember when you thought people in their 20’s were grown ups? Hahahahahelp me”? It’s hilarious because it’s true. When you’re a kid you see grown ups and almost have this sense of… relief… because you think to yourself ‘no matter how badly I get in trouble or how sad and confused I get sometimes, I’m going to be an adult soon and everything will be better!’ Well, I sure thought that anyway! The thing is, you don’t just become an adult at a certain age and you don’t just become an adult once you’ve accomplished something. So what is it that changes for you to feel and look like a grown up?
For a lot of people, it happens when you disregard any sense of childish wonder and the ‘nonsensical’ ambitions you used to have (and yes, I said that in a posh old lady’s voice). So many of us have been told over and over again to ‘grow up’ and to ‘stop acting like a child’ etc. etc. but we forget that the people telling us those things and still just trying to grow up themselves! It’s a viscous cycle! Nearly (nearly…) anything can be linked to childhood experiences such as violent and obsessive behaviour, the inability to stay in one relationship, unconditional trust, kindness, ect. Whether it’s from a parent/guardian or another person who had a big impact on our lives, we learn character and personality traits as children that often go unchanged.
Think about anyone who has annoyed you in the past, can you see how their inner child is looking for attention in the only way they know how? And that the way they act when they don’t get that attention can be a result of childhood learning curve? Let’s use the example of a young woman who has a bit of a substance problem and might be called something like a ‘floosy’. On the outside, it might look like she doesn’t care about her health or appearance, doesn’t seem to respect herself because she sleeps with a lot of men and just isn’t really doing anything with her life. What goes unnoticed SO often is that she might have not been taught the importance of health as a child or she might have seen her mother or father disrespecting their partners so now she thinks that’s what a relationship is.
My point is that inside all of us is our inner child still healing from something that we’ve tried to ignore, maybe we even thought we dealt with it, so that we could move on with our lives and ‘grow up’. You might be thinking of something specific or it might be subconscious, either way, look into yourself and let your inner child come out! Let him or her remind you what you love and how much fun you have when you do a certain thing but more importantly, let them remind you what areas of yourself need healing and let them tell you how to heal it!!! You’re inner child knows what’s in your best interest, listen to them.
Until next time,